Wednesday, March 30, 2016

It's Good to Be Writing Again

Hello friends,
  I would like to start this as though it hasn't been four years since my last post. No long list of excuses for such a long silence. No explaining how busy I've been. Just this...I'm here now. Here to visit with you although I'm not exactly sure that my blog title Jen's Table is an accurate description of what I will be writing about. Due to a very different life than what I had four years ago, I don't spend as much time pouring over recipe books or Pinterest anymore. It sometimes seems more like, what have I not made so often that you guys are sick of eating it? I miss the days of cooking huge feasts for my family and friends but it's a new season. There will be lots of time in the years to come for me to spend days baking and frying... so they say!

I will tell you about my latest adventure/fiasco. Whole30. I have had so many opportunities to explain this idea in the past month but the easiest, less wordy way to put it is basically eating only whole foods for a month. Meats, vegetables, fruits, eggs, and nuts. I did a lot of research on it and it sounded perfect. I got Jonny and Ally both on board with me and we started the last day of February. I had done a lot of reading and pretty much knew to expect some grumpiness and fatigue. I started on a Monday morning and by Wednesday night I was starting to doubt. You see...I actually do not like vegetables. At least, not vegetables the way most people like vegetables. I like them dipped in batter and fried. When I was a kid I remember my Grandma telling me that I needed my vegetables and then taking me to Luby's and letting me get mac n' cheese, fried okra, broccoli with cheese, fried chicken, and a roll. You know...vegetables!

After a few hours on Wednesday night of doubting, I did fine until the following Sunday. That day I almost lost it. I wanted to slap and scream at every  human, animal, car, or anything else that got in my way. I cried and tried to talk my family into trying something different. The way it worked with having three of us was that whenever one of us felt weak (mostly me) the others would keep us going. So keeping on going is exactly what I did. The second week was a little better. I tried eating more roasted veggies. That is my favorite healthy way to cook them and the only way I can really eat them at all without batter!

By the end of the third week, instead of feeling stronger and more energetic I began to get down. Really low down. I was craving like crazy even though everyone had said that the cravings would subside after the first or second week. I developed bags under my eyes and lost all of the tiny amount of patience I possess. I was considering stopping just so I could get back to doing school with my kids but I was too embarrassed to stop when so many people knew that I was doing it and were cheering me on. But after a talk with Jonny who by the way did excellent for almost the entire month, he encouraged me to do what was best for me and not what I felt like others expected of me. So I stopped. I stopped and am still telling myself that it's okay. I have figured out that Whole30 is great for some. It's great for people who have food allergies that they aren't aware of. It's great for people who love vegetables. But it wasn't great for me.

A few good things came from it. I lost ten pounds and found the motivation to continue making healthier choices. I also became more aware of just how much I depend on food to comfort me. I do not regret that I tried Whole30. Now I know.

Good night friends. More on a different subject on a different night. Not sure when, but sometime.